And I think I’m screwed.
Yesterday I was feeling really happy because so many things happened when I was out with my dad and when I came home I couldn’t wait to tell my crush about it… Like I don’t know, even when those things happened I found myself thinking about telling him or about much would he like to hear about that.
And I did, I told him everything.
But now I realized, he isn’t like that with me. He barely tells me anything unless I ask him which I hardly do because I feel like I’m invading him.
Today he didn’t go to school and I felt so out of place. I don’t know why but the day felt so off for some reason until it hit me it was because he wasn’t there. Even if he doesn’t talk to me, I like knowing he’s there, I like looking towards his seat and seeing him there. What hurts is the fact the I’m sure he doesn’t feel that way when I’m gone. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t even notice that I’m not around.
I wish he’d do that, to tell me about the smallest and silliest detail of his day, to miss me and feel my absence like I felt his. Or like today since he didn’t go that he’d come to me and ask me for the homework and use it as an excuse to just talk to me… I guess I’m just asking too much.